Glad to be Wrong

Rickyralph visited Saturday a week ago. He looked fit and well, and our conversation revealed that he's comfortable with where he's at. I congratulated him on his recent 65th birthday. Born seven months before me, he was always going to beat me there if he stayed alive long enough, which I must admit I was not always confident about.

You see, as he reminded me on one of his visits not long ago, I once told him he wouldn't make it to thirty. I had forgotten saying this, perhaps we were about 20, but he said that at the time it gave him a jolt and made him think deeply. The reason I had said it to him was that he was such a risk taker, foolhardy if you like, and by that time he'd already had quite a few close shaves. In fact you could say at the time that he was lucky to have survived to that point.

Not that he was on his own in that, I shudder at the recollection of some of my dangerous activities, usually involving alcohol and driving, but also other stupid things that could have led to serious consequences, but didn't thankfully. Many of these incidents were in the company of Rickyralph, and in all truth we were a little crazy. As youngsters we had many irate male adults in our pursuit who left us in no doubt they would have killed us if they caught us.

I think we both got off a bit on the excitement, but it was usually me trying to bring some restraint and caution to a situation while Rickyralph was just full on bold as brass, and often laughing in the face of danger... all go go action.

We discussed some of this and he reminded me of many incidents that I had forgotten about, he has a better memory of our youth and early adulthood than I do. One thing he said was absolutely crazy was the stuntman acrobatic somersaults he used to do off water skiis at high speed, just for the thrill of it and for the amusement of those in the boat who reveled in the spectacular crashes back to the water. He only stopped this after one time nearly crushing his testicles and enduring considerable agony. He concedes now that he was so lucky he didn't break his neck or his spine.

So for two old blokes who are still mates after more than 50 years since meeting, it is of great satisfaction to us that we can meet and laugh and reminisce. We met in 1964 at Malvern Grammar School, Rick was 12, I turned 12 in April. He was a tennis champion at that young age, and became Victorian U14 hardcourt champion. I was into cricket and football, we were both competent at sport, and showed considerable promise academically, enough to be in Set One when we progressed to Caulfield Grammar School in 1966. There were Sets 1-6, each about a class of thirty, which were graded so that each set did maths and science in the same class.

Probably we became closer friends as a result of being in these same set with all the brainy students. We both struggled to keep up, and by 1968 we had become close friends and sought solace and comic relief from a system that did not suit us at all. Our academic performance fell away as did our interest in sport. Rickyralph was full of energy that couldn't be restrained by a classroom, he was always being punished for one reason or another, often much to the humour of both the students and the teachers. A likeable rogue.

He was a handy chess player and joined the school chess team. Odd that. I never have played chess, or tennis for that matter. The school was competing in chess with Korowa Girls Grammar and he fell in love with his opponent, a girl called Penny. Penny's family had a holiday house in Lorne, and as had become our habit to travel to Lorne or Torquay on school holidays, I met Penny's sister Jane and fell head over heels in love. During this time Rickyralph took up surfing and with an older friend from the tennis team who had left the school but had a car and licence we often went to Lorne on weekends in the hope of seeing Penny and Jane who often were there with their parents. Later when Rick got his licence we were down there all the time in his old man's Humber Hawk.

One time prior to that we were hitchhiking down there, we used to catch the train to Footscray I think and get onto the Geelong Road and stick our thumb out. This particular time we were in a car with an absolute loony driver who just went like hell on wheels. I think it was summer of '67 or '68, anyway we got to Lara and there was smoke blowing across the road in a gale and cars were stopped but our bloke kept going even when you could hardly see the road. He just gunned it through the smoke despite the danger of hitting a stopped vehicle. Being young and silly we didn't appreciate the danger we were in. On the way home that same day the whole area was blackened and there were countless dead sheep in the paddocks and a number of burnt cars. Some people were killed and many burnt severely as they tried to outrun the flames of the fast moving grass fire. We must have been one of the last cars that made it through earlier that day thanks to our loony driver.

Rickyralph and I courted Penny and Jane over a few years, sometimes going out as a foursome. We were besotted totally, unfortunately the girls didn't quite have the same feelings and we were rejected time and time again, persisting for a few years during which we thought of nothing much else than these two lovely young ladies, who were to us like goddesses from mythology. We followed them, we spied on them, we plotted, tried everything. Alas, we dipped out. The first cut is the deepest.

But this cemented our friendship. It also led us in a way to discover other adventure, like exploring the coastline and bush, finding waterfalls and cliffs. One day we descended the cliffs near the twelve apostles and went into the cave from the ocean side and into the blowhole. It must have been low tide and a calm day to enable this because I have been there other times when she was blowing hard and it would seem suicide to do that. Often when the girls were not there or we were spurned we'd head out and sit and drink at night listening to the radio, maybe with a campfire. We took up fishing. We both loved the outdoors.

So for some years we were nearly always in each other's company when we could be. I went to a different school halfway through 1968 after being expelled. Our friendship continued after we left school and started working. For the next decade or so we had separate lives employment wise but often coordinated our holidays and we had many memorable trips away.

Our 30's saw us married and raising families and not seeing as much of each other but the bond of friendship is there, even though we don't need each other for support like we did in our earlier days.
Rickyralph has done well. He's still working but is eyeing retirement. After a varied working career he has spent the last 7 or 8 years as a lineman. He drives a crane truck and operates the crane to replace electricity poles and equipment. He works casual for a contracting firm and is paid a very high hourly rate. His parents died quite young. He was particularly close to his father, who would be very proud of him I'm sure.

May my good friend Rickyralph have many more happy and healthy years ahead of him. I'm glad I was wrong about him not making 30.