Tuesday, January 24, 2017

Positivity

Sarah Ariss is a cognitive hypnotherapist in England and somehow her posts come up on my Facebook homepage. I'm not sure why this is, but I think it's something to do with her attending some advanced classes in aspects of hypnotherapy where the leader was Dr Brian Roet whom I have known for a long time. Brian was centre half back in Melbourne's 1964 Premiership team as a young man, and I met him personally in 1975 when I was working at Redpath's Beeline Apiaries and he walked in to inquire about obtaining bees as he'd bought property at Upper Beaconsfield and thought bees might do well there.

Brian was at the time a gynecologist and to abbreviate a story I helped him with his bees, and we had contact over a few years. I was working in Wangaratta from 1976 but was often home on weekends and when sister Meredith was expecting her first child I suggested Brian to her and he worked with Meredith through her pregnancy and birthing. He had a life change after that and left Australia to live in England and become a hypnotherapist. I have probably told that story somewhere previously in more detail in my blog, it's difficult to remember all that you write and I'm sure I'm a little repetitive sometimes.

I contacted Brian a few years ago when I thought I had polymyalgia, this being thirty years after our last contact, to ask him if he knew of any tricks I might do to improve my situation. After a little jogging of his memory he recalled me well and sent me some meditation tools. During that process I must have "liked' something on Facebook that came up mentioning Dr Brian Roet and I now receive updates from Sarah Ariss, and I just love her thinking and writing. So I'm going to try to reproduce some here. I tried to copy and paste straight from her blog but warnings came up from Blogger which I don't quite understand so I'm going to try saving on word then copy and pasting.

About Me…
A Little More about Me…
I have always been interested in people. As a teenager I was painfully shy, but I have learnt that asking people about themselves is a great way to overcome that shyness. Its funny how a smile and an interest in another person can make you forget your own self consciousness! I love listening to people. Which is fortunate in my line of business!
I have always enjoyed drawing and painting and my latest interest is photography. All the photos on my website were taken by me. I photograph the countryside around where I live and particularly like macro shots of flowers!
At university I studied History of Art and then English Literature. Love of learning is something that plays a huge part in my life.
Why did I decide to become a Cognitive Hypnotherapist?
I have experienced, with a close family member, just how frustrating and upsetting it can be to have to fight for help where Mental Health is concerned. I decided that if I could ever help anyone in the same position in the future, I would. I want to treat people with care, respect and kindness.
My own life changing experience of hypnotherapy came when I sought help for a fear that was beginning to really restrict my life. In one session my life was transformed. The strange thing is that I remember asking the therapist “Did you actually hypnotise me?? ” It didn’t feel weird or life changing – I just felt calm and relaxed. I couldn’t really believe how quickly and powerfully the therapy worked. It was as if the fear had never been there…
I began to realise that training to be a hypnotherapist myself would mean being able to help people in a way that would be both extraordinary and incredibly rewarding. I knew that I would be able to help people who were possibly in the same position I had been in with my family member.
I wanted to make sure that I studied Cognitive Hypnotherapy with a school that was credible, supportive and that gave me an in depth knowledge of my subject.
I researched courses extensively and chose to study with the founder of Cognitive Hypnotherapy and Wordweaving™,  Trevor Silvester, at the Quest Institute in Regent’s University, London. It is a decision that has quite simply changed my life. The HPD Diploma course is an eleven month course with hands on practice as well as written examinations including case studies. It is intensive and thorough. The Quest Institute is considered one of the premier schools for hypnotherapy in the country.

Positivity.
Positivity is not something that everyone has. When faced with a challenge, or a dilemma, some people’s first reaction is “I can’t do that!” For example, when I wrote a post about Relaxation and how important is is for our mental health, a couple of friends told me that they just don’t have time to relax. I have another friend who is very ill, but I never see her without a massive smile on her face and a determination to make the most of every day. I wonder what makes the difference? Why does one person find quite small challenges impossible and yet another is willing to keep trying even when they know that the challenge they face is enormous?
A Change of Mindset
I had lunch with my mum the other day. She is 80 this year and never ceases to amaze me. Since my father died 16 years ago ( I can’t quite believe its that long…) she has grown and grown as a person, full of energy and vigour. Having smoked for 60 years she recently gave up and looks even brighter than ever. But she wasn’t always like this. I remember her being quite a negative person, but as time has gone on she has changed. Her cup is no longer half empty, but half full. Most days she would tell you her cup is full to overflowing. Even when she has difficult times, and she’s had a few lately, she lifts up her head and says, “I am not going to let this affect me. I am going to be good and kind and positive.”
So how has she changed? And how do clients I work with change from the negative loop they are in, to a loop of positivity?
The Two Wolves
There is a story I tell people…you may well have heard it before, but I find that it really resonates with the people I see. It is the story of the Two Wolves… There was once an old man, a Cherokee, who was sitting with his grandson….They were talking together about life and the way we live.
The old man told the boy that each of us has within us two wolves who constantly battle for superiority. There is a Bad Wolf full of Anger, Hatred, Self Pity, Arrogance, Envy, Lies and Negativity…. and there is a Good Wolf full of Love, Kindness, Empathy, Hope, Humility and Positivity.
The boy looked at his grandfather and thought for a while, then asked, “Grandfather, which of the two wolves is strongest? Which wolf will win?” The old man smiled at his grandson and said, “The one you feed…”
Every Cloud has a Silver Lining
So is that the secret? Can you become more positive by seeking out the good things in life and choosing to feed your Good Wolf? My answer to that would be, Yes. Now, I know that not every day is brilliant. There are days when things are actually rather rubbish and there can be periods of our lives when it seems everything is dark and dismal. Yet, even in those days there will be moments where the sun shines through, moments where the dark clouds are not quite so dark.
By feeding our Good Wolf we lighten our days. If we can find one good thing from a terrible situation, or if we can react in a way that is kind and understanding, it changes the way our brain works. By feeding the good we start to notice more of the good around us and that way the sun starts to shine.
I am not saying that this is the easiest thing you will ever do, but wouldn’t all of us rather live in a world where the Good Wolves thrive? There is no script to our lives…. There are no rules that say you have to be a certain way… and that means that you can change. Tomorrow, or today, or now….you can choose to think a different way. I think that’s what my mum has done. I think that she has chosen to love the people and the world around her, no matter what, and by feeding her Good Wolf she has changed the way she thinks, the way she lives. She relishes life.
That is part of the work I do….helping my clients to think a different way. It is so wonderful to see people realise that, if they choose to, they can change their lives. If you are curious then why don’t you get in touch?
sarah@sarahariss.com               07894564287               sarahariss.com





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