Acai

I came across a new word yesterday. Acai. Of all places to find a new word, it was on a piece of litter I picked up on my walk. I don't know what acai is, it isn't listed in my dictionary, but I'm assuming, from the context in which it's written, that it's a fruit of some sort.

It's on a plastic drink bottle. It's sitting right in front of me, while I share the bizarre marketing text with you. When you think about it, writing is everywhere. People read newspapers, books, magazines, brochures, letters, emails, maps, signs, laws, bylaws, product information, etc, etc. All this writing is written by someone for a reason, and basically, it's the oil that lubricates society and enables it to function. I guess that's why we pack kids off to school at an early age.

I'd seen this plastic bottle on the roadside, the nature strip actually, on the other side of the road to where I walk at this point, for three or four days. My handful of regular readers know that I pick up litter on my walk and feel good doing it. Bottles, cans, paper, plastic, most of it goes to a recycling receptacle and every day it's a small contribution I make to help the planet. A lady of insight and wisdom once said to me that she believes in the ripple effect - a small drop makes a ripple that spreads out across the pond, touching everything. And often I remind myself of the verse by Goethe. (post 31 Dec 2006)

Austere perserverance
Harsh and continuous
May be employed by the smallest of us
And rarely does it fail its purpose
For its silent power grows irresistibly
Greater with time.

Normally I only pick up stuff directly in my path (I have limited time), except for aluminium cans which I collect for Jod to sell to the recycling depot. But if a piece of litter remains where I see it for a few days, like this bottle, it annoys me enough to make me cross the road.

I put it my backpack, which I unzipped when I got home and made my way toward the recycling bin, unscrewing the cap and tipping the remaining pinky, syrupy looking liquid into a variegated box plant as I walked past. The colour of it made me curious. I sniffed the open neck of the bottle; it reminded me of the scent of bubblegum from childhood. Wondering what on earth it was, I read the label.

In the largest letters on the bottle, printed 3 times vertically from bottom to top, spaced evenly around the bottle, is "vitamin water". Above the "water" is the word "GLACEAU", in capital letters, but smaller. Underneath one of the "vitamin waters" but in smaller print than the three "vitamin water" and "GLACEAU", is the addition, "nutrient enhanced water beverage".

In the three spaces between these vertical lines of print, at the top, horizontal, in the second biggest print on the bottle is the word "triple-x". Then underneath, "acai-blueberry-pomegranate (triple antioxidants)".

In small writing under one of these is, "contains less than 1% juice." Below this is the nutritional information where the fat, sugars, vitamins etc are listed, grid form, in smaller print again.

In the second space under "triple-x" etc, the ingredients are listed, "formulated beverage contains: water, fructose, sucrose, food acids," etc, etc, right through all the vitamins and fruit, including the "acai (0.027%)".

It's the text in the third space, in larger print, with clear, well spaced writing, that raised my eyebrows -

"c'mon get your mind out of the gutter. we only mamed this drink triple-x because it has the power of triple antioxidants to help keep you healthy and fight free radicals. so in case you're wondering, this does not cost $1.99/minute or contain explicit adult content or anything considered 'uncensored'. it has not 'gone wild!!!' nor will clips of be passed around the internet like a certain hotel heiress. it has never been seen live or nude, but it is definitely out there."

I don't know what to make of that, but I guess there's the power of suggestion. We've got; 'help keep you healthy', 'fight free radicals', 'mind in the gutter', 'explicit adult', 'uncensored', 'gone wild!!!', 'clips passed round the internet', 'a certain hotel heiress', 'live or nude', and 'out there'. Wow! Maybe I should get hold of some acai. I've had blueberries and pomegranates.

Turn the bottle back to the nutritional information grid and straining the eyes, you can see the only thing listed in g's rather than mg's is carbohydrate sugars - 5.4 g per 100ml. That works out at 27g per 500 ml bottle, or 5 teaspoons of sugar. In a bottle of 'vitamin water'!

The last thing for me to check out was the manufacturer. Under the nutritional information it says, "made for the centre for responsible hydration by" --- you'll have to guess, or find your own bottle.

It's amazing, improving my vocabulary on my walk.